a cold experience

Braving the cold waters of Lake Ontario in April.

I had already made up my mind, I knew I was going in all the way.  I still couldn’t just jump in, I knew it would take a few minutes before I muscled up the courage to take the plunge.  

The water was so clear and inviting.  It was also only 43F, or 6 degrees celsius. 

How could water so pretty, calm and alluring be so sharp and bite so hard?

I stepped into the water, wearing 3 swim caps, ear plugs, goggles and a bathing suit.

Psychologically, I hoped the ear plugs would keep the water out of my head and prevent brain freeze (I think it worked).

Within 15 seconds, my feet were aching with pain.  Almost everything in my body is screaming at me to go back to the car, turn on the heat and drive home.  But I knew I would be mad at myself; I had already committed to going in.

Slowly I walked into the water, up to my waist.  With each inch that goes under the water, I cringe a bit more, and even find myself standing on my toes to prolong the inevitable.  In my head I’m thinking, “Drop your heels, you’re only prolonging the pain…focus on something warm, like your armpit or the roof of your mouth…”

The longer I stand here, the colder my feet and legs become. I am aware that there is a limit, and if I’m going in, I must not wait too long. 

Oh, hang on…the pain in my feet has disappeared, and I think it’s turned into a numb, slightly burning feeling. I can’t feel my feet now…perfect!

Now to get to it.  I put my goggles down over my eyes.

I’ve discovered how much more brave I feel with my cap and goggles on. I’ve described them as my cape.  

Trying to get in the water without my gear on, is like riding a roller coaster without being strapped in.  I just feel prepared, safe, ready to go ahead.  Perhaps my body has learned it’s the signal to go.

After all, all of those mornings and swim practices always begin with my suit, cap and goggles on, and once the goggles are over my eyes, I dive in.

Now I feel prepared, and the hesitation feels dialled down.

I’ve been standing in the water about 10 minutes now, and the shock of the cold water has subsided.  I know now it’s almost time to take my first stroke.

Standing in the water with my arms crossed is my effort to keep some heat in, but it can’t be avoided when I swim. The rush of cold water hitting my face, and my armpits is the most noticeable. WOW.  

The first few stokes I am just reminding myself to calm my breathing, and avoid those hyperventilating quick breaths that cause your body to panic, and your heart rate to skyrocket. 

I’ve never actually experienced brain freeze before (much to everyones surprise) but I imagine the pain I feel in the middle of my forehead, is what brain freeze feels like.  Because it did feel like my brain was freezing.  But something amazing happened after about one minute of swimming.  My body was tingling all over, and it was numb.  I actually can’t feel how cold I am.

“I could totally swim an ice mile!” I thought to myself, “This feels amazing.”

(An ice mile is exactly what it sounds like.  Swimming a mile, or 1.6km in water that is 5 degrees or less for the duration of the swim.)

I have read so much about cold water swimming.  It definitely can be dangerous, so there are many things to be careful of when you’re in cold water.  You must monitor yourself for early signs of hypothermia, so you can get out in time before you’re completely helpless to put warm clothes on.

I’ve been swimming about 10 minutes now, and my body is feeling warm all over…I am thinking, “okay it’s probably time to get out soon, because surely I am not warm”.

When I stand, I wobble.  My numb feet can’t feel the ground beneath me.  I got to the shore and with the help of Kat and Zach I get undressed out of my wet bathing suit, (wearing my awesome hooded towel  (Thanks again Dan Stenning- Amazing gift!) get the warm clothes on and get to the car as quickly as possible.

The after drop begins.  After drop is the return of cold blood from the extremities to the core, which can further drop your core temperature. It’s important that you either have help, or are already in a warm place when the after drop hits.  When you’re shaking uncontrollably from being cold, its hard to dress yourself, or even open your car door (I’ve heard).

Writing this, I realize how this experience can seem silly.  Like, why would anyone do this willingly?

Well, I have to say, it was really fun to challenge myself and attempt something that I didn’t think was possible.  I admire the toughness and drive that ice swimmers have.  To overcome the urge to get out takes almost everything you’ve got to keep going.  Aside from that, it’s wonderful mental training.  Growth happens outside of the comfort zone and this one particular cold swim made the rest of my training swims that week feel easy.  

I felt like a badass.  And I like feeling like a badass sometimes. 

And I felt brave.  I think being a brave badass is something that all who marathon swim embody.